So in the last 5 weeks I’ve had food poisoning (last 3 kilos so yay!) the flu, a cold and now an ear infection. Am on penicillin and bed rest so my plan to hit hard 12WBT training HARD has gone by the wayside as I contend with nausea, fever, dizziness.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOO pissed off! I was super ready for this…or WAS I???? My body has a long history of ongoing, non specific illness, particularly when I’m feeling down or don’t want to do something. It goes into protective mode by making me ill so I am forced to rest, or stay in bed etc.
So I’m wondering WHY now? With this stupid ear infection. If you read Louise Hay (Louise Hay You Can Heal Your Life Pg 190) ear problems relate to anger, not wanting to hear and too much turmoil. As you’ve read above, I have some pretty deep anger issues that I am endeavouring to bring to the surface (in a safe way..not at a yell at the local checkout chick kind of way!) and release it. I’m not sure what I don’t want to hear unless it’s “oh dear another diet” which I can imagine most of my family saying (sorry Michelle I didn’t “say it out loud” to them only to some friends and the Facebook groups I’m part of lol) and there’s not toooo much turmoil in my life. I live opposite the beach, I do have a new flatmate but it’s going well and I was sick before she moved in. I guess not knowing from one day to the next if I’ll be working or not (emergency teacher) and where the next dollar is coming from could be classed as turmoil-esque but I’m endeavouring to see it as the Universe giving me time to take care of myself and prepare me for the right job!
Colds are about too much going on (!) and mental confusion (!!) and disorder.
Flu is about mass negativity and fear. Hmmm don’t believe I’m in that category!
So there are some lovely affirmations to say to remove the blocks but I’m not a super huge fan of affirmations and believe me, I’ve been riding this new age personal development train for nearly 30 years!
I’ve downloaded some lovely Self Love and Banish Self Sabotage tracks though and they seem to be helping!
So I”m lolling in bed as I write this looking at the gorgeous sunny day outside, longing to be out there but too dizzy to move (stupid middle ear infection balance thing!).
Just thought I’d touch base about my lack of raving about 12WBT FOR THE MOMENT and let you know I was still alive…anyone out there who’s reading this..although I’m mostly writing for myself to get my thoughts out and down and because Mr. Hunter my high school English teacher said I was an excellent writer who was wasting my talent being a teacher lol!